AN ESCAPE FROM REALITY;

Thursday, March 12, 2009

So then, if you really this this is funny
Right now, right here. I could tell you otherwise.
I can't show you how much it hurts
To adore you, like i love french fries.

'Cos it's sickening, at least to me
To have confusing feelings bugging me.
They wouldn't leave, nor would they budge
You're staying in my heart. So pay a fee.

Idk why i should still bother
Not that i want it, just can't help it.
It would be great to forget evrything
World without you, seems happy &fit.

I'd really love for the world, one day
When i've finally gotten you out of my mind.
By then i can stop the tears from flowing
&by then things would be really fine.

But well, til that day comes (if i ever did)
I guess i'm still stuck in this mess.
Kicking the mud, &wasting time
If it comes, i'd call it a fest.

Idk how to feel properly anymore
Everytime i feel this way, it's always incorrect.
Was it me who wonder &think too much?
Maybe those were just thinking, instead of facts.

Poem dated: Today

another sweetest escape
4:49 PM

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Sometimes, pretence seems to be my mask
The mask i wore to deceive everyone
To convince people, &make them believe
On the outside, i'm okay &i'm having fun

Sometimes, lying seems to be my speech
Every single word i said, are fake
Every tue feelings bottled up inside of me
Cos right now, i've no true friends to take

Sometimes, there's a stranger in the mirror
Even myself, can't recognise who's that
That reflection's acting so strangely
Wait, she even look fat

I'm pretending, every single second
Even right now, when i'm typing this
My face's smiling, my heart's bleeding
Too fake, that's why i'm pissed

Poem dated back: 8 June 2008

another sweetest escape
10:48 PM

Monday, June 9, 2008

______ oh ______
I do feel for you
You're the reason why
Pathetic i feel

'Cos it just seems as though
This is a bottomless pit
I can't stop it, now help it
My feelings, it all eat

I feel so though
I'm being torn apart
Nth left alive
Bleeding is my heart

Yet no, it's not your fault
For it's me &my foolishness
That causes troubles
&this confusion

I guess it's me
For being oh-so-stupid
Catching the wrong signals
I'm such a twit

I know you don't feel
At least not the way i feel
But i hope you still know
My feelings are all real

Here i'm yearning
Yearning for smth fake
&i look around
To see there's nth to take

I waited for all my life
Waiting for someone right
But all the wait was in vain
&i'll never see the light

But alas, who else can i blame?
I found myself, alone, standing
Empitness &darkness surround
&my heart's still bleeding

Time is a cruel one
It keeps ticking it's life away
Memories are evil ones
For they took away my days

Now my world seems dark
&my sunny days were gone
There're nights, but never sun
&i wonder when will i be re-born

Poem dated back: 5 June 2008

another sweetest escape
9:15 AM

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

I know this might not concern you as much
But i just thought you'd like to know
My feelings aren't the same anymore
Dont ask me, i dont exactly know

Cos i realised you're not the same
At least not as to what i have in mind
But i can't deny this fact
You're stil able to make things fine

But please no, i hope you'd know
You're definitely not everything
You do know that without you
I'm free like anything

Though i can't deny the fact
That my feeling's still around
Without you, everywhere's empty
Quiet, &without a sound

&i simply have to admit
That you're still in my heart, somewhere
&i do kinda wish i know
In your heart, how much do i fare

But nah, dont worry
I've got it straightened out
Cos i finally understand
This time clearly, without a doubt

For, where you're concern
There's standing place just for 'she'
This i understand
Cos i once had a 'he'

Dont worry, dear
I'll pull through (i think)
Maybe it isn't difficult
Not as tough like other things

For i know;
Broken wings will soar
Up, up higher than before.

Poem dated back: 4 June 2008

another sweetest escape
10:27 PM

Friday, May 30, 2008

People out there
Fighting to keep their life
Indivuduals (like me) here
Trying to take a five

I dont know what's wrong
I dont know what's so screwed
All i know is
Things are just so crude

Reality comes
Slapping you across in the face
It caught you in a shock
Like you're still in a daze

People claim they'll always be there
That's what they said
But when the time comes
All their promises started to fade

But that's exactly what they said
'I'll always be here for you'
How can i ever, ever believe in it?
How can i be such a fool?

Cos nothing is reliable
Let alone say promises
Everthing seems superficial
This isnt just my own deductions

I loathe it, when i realised
Another paper promise made to me
But as much as i dislike it
I refused to set them free

I refused to open up
Cos i know nobody understands
If only someone would know
'Nobody' is not a friend

I wouldn't speak
&voice out my opinions
Cos bottling up seems like
A much better solution

Everything's fading
Into an ugly shade of blue
This harsh reality
Set me having flu

Poem dated back: 30 May 2008

another sweetest escape
11:19 PM

Monday, May 26, 2008

My feelings &emotions now, are in a mess
My inner thoughts, i find it hard to access
I feel that nothing is going right
&everything else, is what i have to fight
I feel that everything i had is slipping away
&i don't have strength to start another day

Where are those self-proclaim friends?
They weren't there. Wait, it doesn't make any sense
I thought friends are there for one another
Then why is it, no one exactly bother?

Where are the roots of all my emotions?
I'm confused. Sense my confusion
These feelings, i don't know who is responsible of
I thought it was you. I think my thoughts were off

Where are those soulmates, close to my heart
I thought they were ever-present, w/o any but
Where are those pals, buddies &company?
I thought we used to be like, family

What about those promises made to me?
Even thought they were paper promises, i refused to set them free

Is it me who is too stubborn &refused to change
I don't why why i'm staying. I've nth to gain
I know memories hold an impt place in me
To my heart, memories hold the key

I still don't know why are my feelings in a whirl
Everyone experiences this, especially girls
For we are the creatures, who think too much
These are just my feelings, just a little hunch

Poem dated back: 24 May 2008

another sweetest escape
2:55 PM

I cant believe, i'm feeling like this again
Just how many times, does it have to pain?
I can't wait til i give rid of these blues
Give me a hint, i cant find any clue

I want you to know that i feel for you
Thes emotions, these moods, i hate to feel
I wishyou know, that i'm always here
You always looking the other side, that's what i fear
I really do hope, you'll get to know this
Hah, this is endless, this very silly list

How come is it that you don't feel like i do?
'Cos of you, i'm ill, like i'm having flu
But sweets, you've got to stop for awhile
Don't worry, no refree would call this a foul

All i ever want, is for you to turn around
Just listen, &dont make any sound
There, can you hear &sense it?
It's the feelings for you, that i need to get rid

Although i've been acting like i don't care
Truth is: i want to know how much do i fare
Although i've been pretending that i don't feel
Truth is: my broken heart, i need to heal
Although i've been everything that i am not
Truth is: it's the true feelings which i fought

You were my motivation to start every new day
Then explain to me, why my world is now so grey

You were everythig that i lack in my life
Just like on a hand, fingers there are five

These confessions, i've been holding back
'Cos i know, you've nth that you lack
These feelings, i've been fighting to hide
'Cos i know, you wont bother to keep them in sight
These tears &sorrow, i've tried to contain
Give me some time, i'll ty to maintain sane

Poem dated back 24 May 2008

another sweetest escape
2:46 PM